

Strangers become kindreds in mere seconds– a look, a glance, a knowing of the heart connects us, even if we’ve never met before. In my seven years navigating the world as a bereaved parent, I am continually struck by the power of the bond between bereaved parents. Bereaved parents share an unspeakable bond. My son’s life was cut irreversibly short, but his love lives on forever. Just because it might make you uncomfortable, doesn’t make him matter any less. Our culture isn’t so great about hearing about children gone too soon, but that doesn’t stop me from saying my son’s name and sharing his love and light everywhere I go. I love my child just as much as you love yours– the only difference is mine lives in heaven and talking about about him is unfortunately quite taboo in our culture. I want to speak about my deceased children as normally and naturally as you speak of your living ones. I want to say and hear his name just the same as non-bereaved parents do. Just as parents of living children unconditionally love their children always and forever, so do bereaved parents. There will never come a day, hour, minute or second I stop loving or thinking about my son.


If you’d like an inside look into why the loss of a child is a grief that lasts a lifetime, here is what I’ve learned in my seven years of trekking through the unimaginable. Compassion and love, not advice, are needed. If you love a bereaved parent or know someone who does, remember that even his or her “good” days are harder than you could ever imagine.
